Egotistic vs. altruistic speaking in foreign languages

What is an egotistic speaker in foreign languages?

An egotistic speaker does care only about one thing. How does he or she look like while speaking in a foreign language?

Very often, if we are frightened of speaking in front of other people, if might very well be that we are unconcerned about the other people, about the valuable information we can to give to them. We are more concerned with their potential criticism of us.

This mentality or mindset might lead to different strategies in different people, also depending on their language skills.

If they are beginners, they tend to focus on memorizing catchy phrases and entire dialogues. Or they are excessively concerned with having the perfect pronunciation. They demonstratively show off the great BBC accent they have.

If they are advanced speakers, they bombard you with a never-ending stream of words. If you are a native speaker, they want you to tell them how great they learned your language.

They ask less questions and they do not encourage or validate answers. Instead, they are happy to continue talking themselves.

What is an altruistic speaker in foreign languages?

An altruistic speaker starts by thinking: How can I help the other person? What information could be useful?

Then, they start thinking about how to convey this information in the best manner. What words and expressions will most likely be understood? How much do I need to talk to help the other person understand the message? When should I stop? How can I make sure that they really have understood what I said?

How can you shift from being an egotistic to becoming an altruistic speaker in foreign languages?

Start observing how others talk to you. Are they egotistic or altruistic speakers in this specific situation? What made you feel that? Make a list of behaviors that altruistic speakers display. Start practicing those behaviors, introducing them step by step in your daily conversation. Start with conversations that represent no pressure on you, where the stakes are low and there are no emotions involved. Gradually, as you are becoming better, try transforming the more complicated situations, too.

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Gerhard Ohrband is a psychologist, book author and language teacher from Hamburg/Germany. Starting as a shy student, he currently speaks over 21 languages and assists business executives and companies in developing better international communication skills.

https://www.linkedin.com/in/gerhardohrband/

Want to get rid of insecurity and bad feelings regarding the foreign language(s) you have already started to learn? Want to learn a new language, without going through various levels of standard courses? You feel you are making no progress?

Go to Amazon and grab a copy of my classic book ”The GO Method – breaking barriers to language learning”.

https://www.amazon.com/GO-Method-Breaking-barriers-language/dp/1973118688/ref=sr_1_1?crid=ZLMGYKR6PDY3&keywords=Gerhard+Ohrband&qid=1694099394&sprefix=gerhard+ohrband+%2Caps%2C239&sr=8-1


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